Friday, July 31, 2015

Munda kurri gora hona chai da


Bohtay lokaan dee ehi dua hondi ah gora hovay. Eh kes tarran ho sakda keh maan baap kalay hon tay olad goori ho javay? bacha paida honay tay lagay shagay day log govair launday keh bacha kehtay ghia? koi kehnda maa tay ghia, koi kehnda baap tay ghia. Khair eh jaanay day govair buht door tak chalay janday ah. Eh door es wastay chalay janday ah keh munday yaan kurri da rung gorra kidaan ho ghia?
Menu ik family day kahr jaanay da mauqa milya young couple dono 30 day lagay shaagay? dono kalay laikun munda pohray ballaan vala, phoriyan akhaan tay gora rang. Main jehray baili naal ghia aunay kehya keh burriyan duavan mungday see keh ehnaa dee aulad goori hovay nehn tay hovay ee naa. Rab nay vee ehna dee dua aisi sunni keh munda hoya tay oh bilkul ee goora ho ghia. oh mohtrama cha banaun kitchen ch ghaiyan tay mera baili menu kun ch keh luga keh koi goora karvai paa ghia.
Main eh ee kahvaan gha keh jay koi dua mungoo tay apnay halaat day hasab naal mungo nehn tay lokaan nu galan kern da mauka mil da ah

Eczema?






Eh bamari kih ah? Eczema ik aisi khuleri dee bamari ah jehday ch khul khurdri ho jandi ah tay khurak hundi ah jay khurak karo tay lahoo nikaln lug painda yaan khuleri zakhmi ho jaandi ah
a medical condition in which patches of skin become rough and inflamed with blisters which cause itching and bleeding.
Eh kyoun hunda? ehdi koi khass vaja tay hajjay tak nehn labh saki es wastay ehda koi allaj nehn pehr eh kharash nu kaht keeta jaa sakda.
1 - Jehray lokaan nu eczema ho jaanda ohna nu chai da keh oh apnay nuh (nails) cut kay rakhan, kiyoun keh nuh korak ker day hoay khuleri nu zakhmee ker dainday ah. jivain ee kitay khurak dee lore pavay tay tuseen aunglian day potiyan naal khurak karo.
2- Jay tuseen thunday mulk ch rehnday ao tay neem garam paani naal nahvo.
3- Tauliay naal pola pola jusay nu saaf karo. jes thaan tay tavanu eczema hai
authay koi cream yaan vaseline lavo ta keh authoon khaleri dee khushee kaht javay
4- Guvair lavo keh eh kahday naal buhti hundi ah? cotton day kapray pavo jehray tung naa hon. kai khanay peenay vee eh halat ker dainday ah
Kabraunay dee koi lore neh tawanu kalian nu ee eh bamari nehn balkay 300 lakh american vee eh bamari da shakaar ah. Jithay tak Pakistan , India Bangla desh tay Middle east da taalk ah authay tay eh buht ah.
Eczema tay main
Main Middle East ch see tay meri ik lat tay khurak hoi tay kuch zakham vee ho ghaiay. Main clinic ghia tay doctor nay menu cream likh kay ditti jehday naal koi farak naa pia. Main fer doctor ko ghia tay aunay menu kehya keh oh skin specialist kol paij dainda. Main skin specialist kol ghia jinay meri skin nu chungi tarran vaikhya . Es nateejay tay puhnchia keh meri lat tay Eczema ah. Aunay kehya keh oh menu cream day dainda jehay naal aram rahvay gha.Main oh cream varti pehr koi aram naa hoya. Kuch dinaan bahd meri dosri lat tay vee kharash hon lug pai jehday naal main buht fikar mund ho ghia keh parsais ch kitay eh meray saray jussay tay naa chala javay. Main Eczema tay research shroh ker ditti.. Menu jo vee cheez kahr ch hundi see nahaunay toon peloon koi naa koi mal kay nahauna. Aakher Rab da kerna hoya keh ik cheez nay kum vakha ditta. Meriyan lataan toon Eczema khatam ho ghia. One thing worked magically? Burri khushi hoi tay main ehnu magic lotion dee shakal ch bana lia.
Magic lotion
Ehda naa main magic lotion es wastay rakh ditta keh eh kaafi khuleri diyaan bamariyan nu khatam ker dainda. Mera programme ah keh ehnu buht ee kaht qeemat tay baichya javay balkay jehday naal ehdi cost vaghaira recover ho javay. Main lokaan nu eh bamari toon najat davauna chaundaan eh ee maqsad . Jay tuseen ehnu market kerna chaunday ao tay eh discus keeta jaa sakda. Perh eh business day tor tay nehn hona chai da balkay lokaan dee seva vastay hona chai daa.

Glory of Punjab Empire ik sauch


Punjab kisay zamanay empire rehya yaan nehn. punjabi da ik akhar ah "Thaan" jehra vigar kay "Tan" ban ghia. Afghanistan da asli naa Afganisthan ah jehda matlab banda afgania dee jugah. Eh taan sure tuwan howay gha keh afganistan kisay zamanay ch punjab da hisa see. Menu ik vari kisay Irani nay kehya keh main Iran toon iran dee sugat lai kay aayan. Main puchya sugat da naa kih ah tay ohnay menu dasya Sohaan. Eh sohaan kih ah eh jidaan sada sohn halwa hunda eh see. Eh sada sohn biggar kay sohaan ban ghia.Iran day sher Zahidaan ik sikh darvish dee wajah naal ah. balkay zahidan ch gurdwara hajay vee ah. jay arabi dee khaleeji nasal dee zaban sun tay aidan ee lagda jidaan eh sadi jungli dee mixed zaban howay. i.e Chula (cooker) Rah tak salam tak, tola gumay tay hor patta nehn kinay kay punjabi lafaz khaleeji arabi ch hai. , Main taan eh kahwaan ga jehra hajjay khyaal ee ah keh jinay mulkaan naal "Stan lugda oh punjab empire da hisa see. ohdee waja eh ah keh ehna mulkaan ch Roma community hai jehnu aseen punjabi ch odh kehnday aan. Eh gypsies "stan" allay mukan ch ee nehn balkay european countries ch vee ah.. Kai writers da khiyal ah keh gypsies da origin punjab ah tay ohna dee zaban punjabi naal mildi juldi ah. mera khiyal ah keh saday jehray odh see yan Banjara baradri ah. Eukrine day 15000 hazar lokaan dee abadi dee zaban jataki ah jehri punjabi naal mildi jull dee ah. Eh vee ho sukda keh kai balkan states vee punjabi empire da hisa hoon kiyoun keh balkan states diyan boliyan ch buht punjabi akhar milday ah. Main ik bari bulgaria ch chala ghia tay main ik dukan toon saban lain ghia tay main oh buddi nu ashryaan naal saban da samjia tay ohnay menu saboon keha. may saban day paisay day kay aun luga tay menu ohnay keh Din dubhray.(Good day). menu kisay nay dasya keh jay sunny howay tay kehday dhup ay.. shorba (soup) ehtoon lugda ah keh sada ehna mulkaan nal koi taakaq rehya. We need bit of research on this area to find clue about punjab empire. It wasintersting to know some people they have mes like Kashmir, Gazanove (gaznavi) etc. Mera khiyal ah keh jay kisay zamanay ch punjab empire hoya ah tay oh chota nehn see balkay aus zamanay dee super power see. ho sakda main galt howan pehr din ba din menu nawain too nawain clues mil rehayan ah tay mera eh khyal yaqeen ch badlda lag da ah. fingers crossed

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Joke

Once a Dutchman, a Hindu, and a Texan were standing together. A Muslim came up and asked, "Hey guys, what is your favorite flower?"
The Dutchman replied, "The Tulip."
"Ha, I clean my shit with that!" the Muslim jeered.
The Dutchman got angry, the tulip being the national flower of the Netherlands.
The Hindu replied, "the Lotus."
"Ha I clean my shit with that!' the Muslim laughed.
The Hindu got angry, the lotus being India's national flower.
The Muslim asked the Texan, "And what is your favorite flower?"
The Texan, smiling, replied, "The cactus flower. Now go clean your ass with that!"

Pashaab aa javay tay rokna aukha


Kal aseen sari family Eid manaun wastay safar ker rehay see tameray chutay baitay (dental surgen) nay dupher day khanay toon bahd 2 punj sau ml drink day dubay pee laiay. Hajay motorway tay puhnchay ee see kahvay kitay roko he is desparate for "pee". Main kehya hun thora jehya sabar ker services aun ghian tay authay jaa kay ker laina. Thori dair bah phay kehn lugga "Iam stroking my willy to hold it back" . Khair services aa ghaian tay oh aseen entrance miss ker ditti. Phay kehn lugga keh main aa darakhtaan day pichay jaa kay daisi tarakay naal ker lainda. Car roki tay dohr kay darakhtaan day pichay jaa kay pichab keeta . Husda hoya wapas aya tay kehn luga what a relief main 2 litre tay non stop pishab keeta hona.
Waqai jedoon pishaab aya hovay tay audoon ee patta lugda keh ik aini chotti jehi cheez kinna kay masla ban jandi ah.
Main ik vari jaleeb Al shvaikh kuwait ghia . Authay ik complex ch kum see .oh kum khatam keeta tay menu pashab dee zaroorat mahsos hoi . Oh complex buht vada see ik do offices chon puchya toilets da tay kehn luggay keh complex navaan banya ah tay toilets ais floor tay chalo nehn hoyaan tay kisay hor floor tay try karan. Lab day lab ik toilets tay puhnchay tay ohnu lock luga hoya . patta lugga keh chabee chowkee dar kol ah. Main basement ch chala ghia patta luga keh toilets chalo nehn. Eh saree nahth pahj ch main ena keh majboor ho ghia keh honian niklia kay niklia. Agay kih vaikh daan keh "Fire Exit" wah Rab Da ker keh Kuwait ch Fire exit lock hunday ah eh vee aidaan day mauqay tay Rab da karam ee lugga. Main phutta phat apni zip kholi tay ais taran luga keh jidaan buht mehn naal parnaala chal painda tay ohdi awaz. Main tay lugda do litre day luggay kitta hon garmian da mausam see. es wastay lassi vee vahva peeti hoi see. Eh pashab kernay nal seenay ch tay damg ch thund pai ghai.
Aik choti jehi cheez vee kai var masla ee ban jandi jehri europe ch lambay safar kernal walay driver "Go behind the wheel " alla jogaad vert kay ker day ah

Kia hum joht kee duniyaan main rehtay hain?


Es duniya kee samaj aanay per sab say pehla swal jo aap kay zehen maun autha hai wo yeh hai keh waqai hum 100% joth kee duniyan main rehtay hain?
Yeh sawal sab say pehlay maray zehan main autha. Main aik chotay say kamray main laita hoa tha. Kamra kia tha ? bas samaj lain keh wo aik chota sa darba tha. Yeh kamra mujay buhat passand tha wo kiyoun? wo es liay keh ghar main "Khdama" nukrani kay liay banaya ghia tha. Khadama kiyoun kehrakhi nehin thee es liay mainay aus main aik kuproon vaali almari fit ker dee.Baqi jo jugga bachi aus main bed nehni aa sakta tha esliay mainay zaeen per hee aik mota sa kumbal teh ker kay bicha dia. Aus kay auper bedsheet . Yeh kamra kuch aisa tha keh aus main meray jaisa single pasli ka insan lait jaiay tau 8 inch juga bachti thee jes per main kuch paper rakh laita aur aik do kitabeen aur apna laptop yaa notebook.
Main aik raat laita sauch raha tha tau achanak zehin nay aik ajeeb see roshni daikhi tau her cheez kee haqeeqat khul ker samnay aa ghai keh hum tu saray hee joht kee duniyaan main reh rehay hain jes ka kahaqeeqat say koi taulaq nehin. Hum berh char ker es ko sabat ker nay kee pur zoor koshish main hain. Agar hum es haqeeqat ko aam logoon kay samnay rakh dain tau aksariat man nay kay lia tiayar nehn . wo haqeeqat ko joht sabat kernay kay liay mukhtalif qiam kay dalail kee buchar ker daitay hain. Yeh dalail kuch mazhab say hee shroh hutay hain. .
Main ziada tafseel main nehin jauoon gha bas yeh hee kahoon gha keh aap bee apnay ird gird nazar dauraeen aur aur zara gaur ker kay batain keh haqeeqat kia hai?
Hum aur hamara maashra her kisam kee buraiyoun aur bad unwaniyoun say ghira hoa hai, balkay hum her kisam kee bad unvaniyoun main dab chukay hain likum phir bee hamain es per fakhar hai. Hum es ko burra kehnay kay liay tiayar hee nehn. Hum gunday paani ku yeh keh ker keh chalta paani paak hai peenay ko tiyar hain laikun jes system nay humain gundgi main qaid kia hoa hai aus kay khalaf aik baat bee sunnay kay liay tiyar nehn

Maulbi naal bana kay rakhu

maulbi naal bana kay rakhni chai dee main tay ik vari maulbi nu kehnday sunya see keh jo kuch likhna hai likho laikun yaad rakho keh maulbi aik aisa tabqa hai jo shehad kee makhtyoun say vee bura. makhyoun say tau bachau ho jaata hai LAIken PEECHAY PER JAAIN tau qabar say bee nikaal laatay hai. Mainay suntay hee aunchee say naara laga dia "Naara Takbir" tay naal ee auchee keh ditta "Allahu Akbar"

Belief is blind


Ajnabi ya Albakistani


Yeh baat main nay eid kee namaz pernay kay baad kissi ko sunai. yeh sahab thay trinidad kay . Arabi Labas pehna hoa aur mujay Eid mubarak kaha aur main nay bee jawab dia. Main samja keh shaid arab hai. Main nay unhain baat sunai keh aik din meri aik colleague phd professor ka phone aaya keh wo gahr kay liay koi frames kay design choose kerna chahati hai agar main uskee help ker doon. aik syrian kee photo frames kee dukaan per chalay ghaiay jo un koo khandani per frames suppliers tha. Jab hum frames choose ker rehay thay tau us syrian nay pucha ye sath kon hai? Meri colleague nay mazaqan keh dia keh mera husband hai. jesaay hee us nay ye baat sunni us ka rang lal ho ghia aur lecture daina shroh ker diya keh yeh kiyoun kia ajnabi kay saath. Yeh saray arab hee aisay hain kiyoun keh dunyaan main jitnay ghulam supply hoay India yaa Africa say wo arab traders kay hathoon say hee guzar ker ghaiay

Pak honay ka jhoth


sari makhlooqat hee gundee hain kiyoun keh hum nutfay say paida huay,.jes amal say paida hoay wo gunda hai . paida hona gunda hai. haqeeqat tau yeh hai keh her cheez kee bunyad gundgi hai, humaray phul sabziyoun ko paida kernay kay liay gundgee hee daltay hain

Doodh


دودھ
(چترا مدگل)
دودھ گھر کے مرد پیتے ہیں۔ کیونکہ وہ مرد ہوتے ہیں۔ اس کا کام ہے – دودھ کے گرم گلاس کو احتیاط سے ان تک پہنچانا۔ پہنچاتے ہوئے وہ ہر روز دودھ کے سوندھے گلاس کو سونگھتی ہے۔ پکے دودھ کی خوشبو اسے خوش کر دیتی ہے۔ ایک روز ماں اور دادی کے گھر پر نہیں ہوتیں تو وہ چٹ – چٹ کوٹھری کھول کر دودھ کے برتن سے اپنے لئے دودھ کا گلاس بھرتی ہے اور گھوٹ بھرنے کو جیسے ہی گلاس ہونٹوں کے پاس لے جاتی ہے، گھر کے اکھڑے کواڑ بھڑاک سے کھل اٹھتے ہیں۔ اس کے ہونٹوں تک پہنچا گلاس ہاتھ سے چھوٹ جاتا ہے اور دودھ کے برتن پر جا گرتا ہے۔ مٹی کے برتن کے دو ٹکڑے ہو جاتے ہیں۔ کوٹھری کی گوبر لپی کچی فرش پر گلابی دودھ چاروں طرف پھیل جاتا ہے۔ قریب آئی بھونچکی سی ماں کو دیکھ کر وہ تھر تھر کانپتی شرمندگی کا اظہار کرتی معافی مانگتی سی کہتی ہے – “میں ۔۔۔ میں ۔۔۔” “دودھ پی رہی تھی کمینی؟” “ہاں ۔۔۔” “مانگ نہیں سکتی تھی؟” “مانگا تھا، تم نے کبھی دیا نہیں ۔۔۔” “نہیں دیا تو کون تجھے لٹھیت بننا ہے جو لاٹھی کو تیل پلاؤں؟” “ایک بات پوچھو ماں؟” آنسو بھیگی اس کی آواز اچانک ڈھیٹ ہو اٹھی۔ “پوچھ!” “میں پیدا ہونے والی تو دودھ اترا تھا تمہاری چھاتیوں میں؟” “ہاں ۔۔۔ خوب۔ پر ۔۔۔ پر تو کہنا کیا چاہتی ہے؟ ‘ “تو میرے حصے کا چھاتیوں کا دودھ بھی کیا تم نے گھر کے مردوں کو پلا دیا تھا؟”
بشکریہ "اردو نثر"

Kissi kay ghar ko aag laganay kay baad aap ka ghar mahfooz rehay gha?


Asif saab zulm kissi kay sath bee ho wo theek nehn lekun kia batana pasand karain ghay yeh kin qurbaniyun kee baat kertay hain.Kinay log maray es migration main es khas tabqay kay?kitnay logoon nayKhoon dia? Khoon jis nay diawo tu shaid aap ko nazar nehin aata, migration jinhoon nay pedal chal kay kee wo kabi nazar aiee?.Qurbani ? Yeh tu punjab say puchain qurbani kia hoti hai jes ka her khandan ka koi na koi mara ghia, maun pehnu aur baityoun kee iztain looti ghaian? Qurbanian dainay valoon kee zuban ko aj tak yeh tabqa aujad aur jungli kehta hai. Es waqat pakistan kee aksariat Punjabi hai kyoun pakistan kee quami zuban Punjabi nehn? Ye h wo tabqa (mostly ulama of this creed) hai jes nay choth bol ker Hindustani (urdu) ko Islami zuban keh ker pesh kia? Aap as a progressive and free thinker hotay hoay yeh kehna chahain ghay keh bahar say anay walay her loot mar kernay walay ko es tabaqay hee nay mujahid e Islam aur Insaniat daust bana ker humari History ko pesh kia. Agar waqai aap apnay aap ko free thinker samjtay hain tu itni tafseel say wakalat nah karain

Puranian yadaan choon


Main kabi sauchta hoon keh pakistani aur Muslim perhay likhay llogoon kay damag main yeh baat nehnee aati keh yeh kia hai? Meri jab ankh khuli tu aisay luga keh " saara ee chooth" Problem yeh ho ghia keh sadiyoon say juth hee perhaya jaata raha. main aik din juma ki namaz pernay ghia to molbi gaib kay baray main bata raha tha. Kehnay luga keh "Tum aurat kay pait ki sau photcopy banatay raho main nehin maanta gaib ka Ilm Allah kay pass hee hai wo hee janta hai keh maan kay pait main kia hai" yes baat manchester ki aik masjid kee hai maulbi Indian urdu speaking tha. Kissi nay bee auth ker yeh nehn kaha keh maulbi xrays and scan results samnay hai jo bilkul 100% sure hai aap es ko kiyoun nehn mantay? merray dill ch buht gussa keh eh kih maulbi choth bolda? kuch din baad Eid thee eid kee namaz perhnay gaiay, Maulbi nay aik hor sosha chud ditta keh Islam main her bamari ka bee alaj haisugar ho cancer ho aids ho aap qareeb to aa kay daikhain. Namaz khattam hoi main nay maulbi ko ghair lia keh maulbi saab yahaan peh buhat logoon ko sugar ki bemari hai , uk ki government buhat paisa kharach kerti hai logoon kee blood sugar level per rakhnay kay liay, aap aj woh nuskha to bata dain jes ka aap khtbay main daava ker rehay thay, Maulbi ghabra ghia hus kay kehnay luga keh voh to janat main jaanay kay baad ki baat ker raha tha. Meray saat uncle thay mujay mazak say kahnay lugay yar kiyoun maubi diyan jaran ch baithan lugaan

Religious fanatics

Main apnay contacts dee chanti shroh ker ditti ah jehray lok buhtay religious fanatics hai nay ohna nu unfriend ker daina tay dosray lok jehray aiveen fotoan laa laa kay actraan vang pose bana kay Fotoaan launday ah oh vee unfriend
Oh log jehray ansaniat naal piyar ker day ah pahvaan oh kisay mazhab rang zaat ohna nu jee ayaan nu

Rab dee paiji hoi army

Rab dee paiji hoi army pakistan da 70% budget harap kernay vali duniya dee behtreen army? menu hor tay koi gila nehn tuseen tay pakistan nu apnay vastay ee janat banaya hoya pehr gareeb diyan her passay siskian pai rehyaan tay oh eh ee keh rehi ah "Pakistan army zindabad". Eh jang dee dramay bazi khatam karo tay aa jao 6th saddi chon nikal kay 21 veen saddi ch.
In 1971 war around 93,000 Pakistani troops and officials were taken as prisoners-of-war by the Indian Army, the largest number of POWs since World War II. They were later repatriated in 1973 under the terms of the Delhi Agreement.